Elijah Dukes: One Year of Model Citizenship

One year ago yesterday, the Nationals traded for Elijah Dukes. Lock your doors, we were told. Hide your daughters, they said. Elijah Dukes--sociopath, attempted murder, certified criminal element--was coming to DC.

Well, a year later, and there have been exactly zero incidents to justify anything remotely resembling what we were told to expect.

Yes, he told Mike Pelfrey to shove it. He thumped his chest after a couple walk-offs. He and Manny had words once. Minor incidents that would have barely been noticed if he wasn't Elijah Dukes: Bad Person ®.

Congrats on a year of model behavior Elijah. We're glad you're here.